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From Something to Nothing


Sad? I am..!

How to deny it? A name had been created since 2011.  I was totally ready for the new baby.  My husband and I have started the pregnancy program with my obstetrician since January. Everything run smoothly. Happy is not enough to describe my feeling of seeing double red lines on the strip, even though one was not brighter than the other but I was pretty sure that our home would be more merrier by the new lil comer at the end of this year.  About the blurry line on the strip? I just ignored it with the reason that the same case also happened with my previous pregnancy. 

The only thing I worried much was about the spotting since last week. It was out of normal if I compared it to my previous one. Trying to be calm while the brown spotting always came together with the light bleeding everyday was not as easy as I thought. Bed rest was suggested by the doctor as a general treatment for early-term bleeding when I met her last Monday.   She (and  my husband and I) did hope we can see the very very tiny baby will-be in my womb this Friday. I did what the doctor suggested to do with all my heart. But this afternoon...obviously..after the bleeding...it seems I have to keep the name back.  More over, the pregnancy test kit showed nothing but empty white space after the bleeding.  Well, I manage to somehow  have good expectations of  Allah's plan and timing.  He knows what best for me. I trust Him absolutely.  The right thing will come at the right time.  Insyaallah.  What to do now is to prepare myself for the next surprised given by Him. 



#P.S.: I send HIM a bunch of hope (a wish list actually) in my prayer and I have no doubt He will put the 'UNBLURRED LINE' at the top.  Just wait and see..!

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